"The world is full of miracles and wonder, of which you and I are a part."
"Not like you to be so positive, Tuppy."
"I know. I'm discombobulated. The sky is greeny yellow and the moon is made of mushrooms. I've just had a manicure and I'm in a crowded Japanese sushi bar sporting a spanking new silk suit and an orange bow tie. I'm also wearing hand-tooled lizardskin cowboy boots with lead toecaps and I'm smoking a liquorice-flavoured cheroot. I want to use my bare hands to kill everyone who smells wrong but I'm afraid I'll get caught."
"You're out of your mind on cheap port and puffer fish."
"I think it's mainly the latter."
We had noticed a news story featuring some 'research' about dolphins who gently chew on puffer fish (without harming them) in order to get the psychotropic effect of the toxins exuded from the skin. We never trust 'research', so we decided to test this theory ourselves. Ergo we went and fetched the net from the attic, pottered down to the Bay at low tide, and caught our own puffer fish.
It's all very well for dolphins, but we didn't fancy holding a live fish in our mouths, and waiting anxiously for it to squeeze out its venom, so we decided to bang it on the head, toss it in seasoned flour and cook it in a light beer batter.
Dousing the fish in batter after slicing it into goujons and then deep-frying it only seemed to intensify the effects. Geoffrey had some too, only it hasn't kicked in yet. Either that or he's immune. Mind you - he didn't have lemon on his, and I did...or was it the other way round?
Time will tell.
We're well-primed for 2014, that is for sure.