"Look Tuppy! It's a nose-dirt extraction device! I'm going to patent it when we get back and I'll be rich as Croesus!"
"It's a turkey baster," I stated flatly. "In fact, it's OUR turkey baster. And I don't want it sticking up people's noses extracting dirt willy nilly and without so much as a by your leave."
"I'd wash it afterwards. Naturally. A good rinse under the tap and a wipe on the old sleeve. It's an object with multiple functionality." He was sounding less convinced by the second. A bit like a wind-up gramophone winding down.
"Yes Geoffrey. I think you'd better take one of your special pills and have a nice lie down under the tartan knee-rug. There's a good chap."
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