Well here we are, still stuck on this sodding boat. Yes I know that's a horrible way to describe our beloved coracle 'Fancy', which has served us so well etc. etc. and been our friend yawn yawn through many dangers - enough already.
If YOU had been crammed into a coracle, especially ours, which is spherical, and has a mind of its own in terms of whether the 'fancy' takes it to actually go where we want it to, i.e. in terms of NAVIGATION, which is kind of an essential aspect of a 'craft', you'd be calling it a 'sodding boat' too, or perhaps a lot worse.
Besides, it leaks.
It doesn't have to leak. It just does, because it's in that kind of mood.
A leaky mood. You could say it was crying I suppose, if you were feeling sympathetic.
Nobody here felt sympathetic.
And nobody was talking to it.
No. We were all talking ABOUT it.
"It's all an act. It's all put on. Ignore it, that's the best way. Anyone got any fags left? I'm gasping."
"I'll sink myself!" shrieked Fancy. "I'll self-destruct! I'll remove my bungs! Don't think I won't!"
"Why though?" Geoffrey was using his most soothing tone. I've no idea if it was deliberate. "Why self-destruct?"
"Well, I'm not sure. But I just feel in that kind of mood. I know what. I'm not going to remove my bungs. I'm going to circumvent the co-ordinates you put in and I'm going to head straight for the Corryfreckle whirlpool INSTEAD, where Death surely awaits. Put that in your pipes and smoke it."
"If only we could," I murmured.
Next time - Cannibalism - the pros and cons when in a tight spot.
If YOU had been crammed into a coracle, especially ours, which is spherical, and has a mind of its own in terms of whether the 'fancy' takes it to actually go where we want it to, i.e. in terms of NAVIGATION, which is kind of an essential aspect of a 'craft', you'd be calling it a 'sodding boat' too, or perhaps a lot worse.
Besides, it leaks.
It doesn't have to leak. It just does, because it's in that kind of mood.
A leaky mood. You could say it was crying I suppose, if you were feeling sympathetic.
Nobody here felt sympathetic.
And nobody was talking to it.
No. We were all talking ABOUT it.
"It's all an act. It's all put on. Ignore it, that's the best way. Anyone got any fags left? I'm gasping."
"I'll sink myself!" shrieked Fancy. "I'll self-destruct! I'll remove my bungs! Don't think I won't!"
"Why though?" Geoffrey was using his most soothing tone. I've no idea if it was deliberate. "Why self-destruct?"
"Well, I'm not sure. But I just feel in that kind of mood. I know what. I'm not going to remove my bungs. I'm going to circumvent the co-ordinates you put in and I'm going to head straight for the Corryfreckle whirlpool INSTEAD, where Death surely awaits. Put that in your pipes and smoke it."
"If only we could," I murmured.
Next time - Cannibalism - the pros and cons when in a tight spot.
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