Fuckall.

"Get out there and DO IT Tuppy!  Come on - get up off your fat back-side and do some star jumps.  Healthy body healthy mind. UP UP UP!!!!  Get that blood pumping through those blocked arteries and flush out those fatty plaques before you develop clinical depression and slash or die of a massive myocardial infarction."

"No.  I've got stuff to do."

"What stuff?"

"Absolutely fuck all - and that's the way I like it.  Now fuck off."

"Did you know there is an island off the north coast of North Rona,  called Fuckall?  It has its own breed of indigenous sheep.  They have orange wool and are cannibals.  And there's an underground cave,  packed with treasure from a wrecked Spanish galleon, which lies undiscovered to this day."

"No, I didn't.  And neither does anyone else.  Stop making things up.  Wait a minute - did you say treasure?  Fetch the coracle Geoffrey, and fill the flask!  We're off to Fuckall on the next tide.  Let's follow the stars and see where fancy takes us."